When am I going to make it?

I’ve decided that I want to start talking a little more frankly and openly about my life on Style Rarebit and express some of the ‘real’ things I’m thinking about right now. This particular vein of worry started about a week ago when I met a couple who are friends with my boyfriend. They were so lovely, they had recently got engaged, lived in a beautiful house and had two children. They were also two years younger than me. I think you can see where this is going. I am 25 and I cannot even get myself out of bed on time, let alone raise a family and afford a house. There are people my age who have their whole life together and honestly I haven’t a single plan past this Saturday. I am still eating tea at the family table, still getting told off for leaving cups in my room and still have not got my career together. Damn.

My boyfriend is becoming a police officer this summer and watching him get through every exam, interview and stage of the process has been so amazing. Don’t for a second misconstrue this as me not being unbelievably proud of him but it also makes me shit myself that little bit more. Everyone around me seems to be finding what they love to do and making it happen. Whether that’s in their career, or starting a family or just creatively making their passions happen everyday. Turning 25, as ridiculous as it sounds, was really daunting and thought provoking for me. I am a quarter of a century old and the fact of the matter is I still have absolutely no idea about what, or where or who I want to be in life.

I am currently working as a stylist/visual merchandiser and it’s honestly one of the most fun jobs I’ve ever had and with some of the most talented women I have ever met. I get to be creative every single day and am free to experiment as much as I like which has been amazing. That being said I’m a graduate in the lowest level job, there’s no progression and for all the hard team work we’re putting in it’s a minimum wage pay check at the end of the month. On this salary I am no further to buying a house than I am being able to stretch my money to reach 31 days. It’s not that I’m being negative but after all the internships, free photoshoots and blogging time I have put in, it’s a little frustrating to be getting nowhere in return.

This may be a bit ranty but my anxiety is at 100 wondering if I’ll ever have my own home. I would love to have a career I can be proud of, or just something to tell people I went to school with, when I bump into them at Tesco so I sound like I’m doing something good with my life. I’m not sure what my next step should be or what avenue is best at this point but I know for sure I am not the only one that feels like this. I guess that’s why I really wanted to write this post, outfits and hair stylers aside this is my online voice after all. Maybe by talking about this someone will comment with an idea or spark my interest in a new career and vice versa. I’m never going to give up but if I can speed up the process all the better for it.

Share:

10 Comments

  1. Lara-Jane
    March 16, 2017 / 5:01 pm

    CHRISTY. EVERYONES LIFE AT 25 IS EXACTLY AS YOUVE JUST DESCRIBED. People only show the good parts of their life to other people. They dont want to tell others that working 9-5 is actually working 5-6:30 and going to bed at 9 and only having 2 days to actually live their life! None of us have a clue whats happening. Youre not alone gurl. As long as you surround yourself with people who inspire you, and let yourself BE inspired by them, you’ll be fine 🙂 i should write inspo posters for moms on facebook….

  2. Jenny
    March 16, 2017 / 8:34 pm

    So nice to know am not the only one, with same thoughts in on head. Am feeling exactly the same.

    Have you tried creating a vision board, it might be quite handy just to see what you can come up with and then narrow it down! Somehow it makes sense once doing it.

    Also, Estee Lalond did this video a while back called “quater life crisis” it was pretty good!

  3. April 19, 2017 / 6:13 pm

    Oh Christy.. I completely understand where you are coming from! At 25 too, and I feel like everyone is progressing, houses, babies like you said and I have gone backwards from having a full time job, a car, living at home and having money – to being a full time student again with no money and living with 18 year olds that cannot even clean!

    I’m just so ready to start making a good start on my career and getting a place of my own, but I know I’m doing the right thing by going back to university as it’s the easiest and fastest way to teach myself to get into the Animation industry.

    I freak out most days and question myself and my choices, but sometimes you just need that slow period to really come to a conclusion. I did it after travelling, it just came to me one day and I was like ‘WHY HAS THIS TAKEN SO LONG ALL OF MY LIFE?’

    You’ll get there Christy, there’s no need to rush anything at all! All these people thinking that you have to do certain things by certain ages – hell no, I’ll be with you on the journey 😀
    We’ll have to meet up again at some point!

    Zoe | nuggetstumpblog.com

    • admin
      April 20, 2017 / 6:50 pm

      Thank you SO MUCH for this comment! This is exactly why I wanted to write this post and I’m so glad that I’m not the only one feeling like this. You are so right, there’s no ideal age and as long as we’re on the right track and enjoying ourselves nothing else should matter. Definitely, it was so lovely to meet you! xx

  4. April 19, 2017 / 6:14 pm

    I apologise for the ridiculously long comment.

  5. Karen mccann
    April 25, 2017 / 1:19 am

    It’s crazy to see you’ve written this! I’ve watched you on Facebook since we graduated thinking, ‘damn that girl has it all.’
    We all feel the same – don’t worry!!!!

  6. Abi
    May 21, 2017 / 12:25 pm

    This is such a lovely honest post Christy! There are so many people older than you that still don’t have it figured out, people just don’t like to show those aspects of their life because it seems as though they haven’t got it together. The most important thing is that you’re happy. The right time will come for you and it will seem like its taken forever, but it will be completely worth it!! x

    Abi | abistreetx

    • admin
      May 22, 2017 / 7:41 am

      Thank you for your lovely girl! You are so right, I can’t believe how many people have said they relate to this post and it’s definitely more important to be happy xx

  7. October 25, 2017 / 9:34 am

    Sorry to hear that you are feeling like this but don’t fret, literally all of my friends feel like this at the moment! We are 27/28 and starting to panic about what we actually want to do with our lives before we ‘settle down’! (Forget about the mid life criss, we call it the mid-20s crisis.) At least you know what sort of work you enjoy and now you can focus on finding a career path that will let you continue that! Steph x
    http://www.stephstyle.com

    • admin
      October 29, 2017 / 10:18 pm

      I love that! 20s crisis, too true! I can’t believe how many people feel the same but it’s nice in a way to know we’re all in the same boat. The good thing though is that we all have goals and we’re working hard! Thank you so much for such a lovely comment xx

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.